I’ve been asked questions by brides if it’s okay to give responsibilities to the entourage like the MOH, Bestman, Groomsmen, and Bridesmaids. This “wedding entourage responsibilities” is actually an ideal based on the West since bridesmaids there, for example, were supposed to pay for their own wedding expenses and is customary to give the bride her bachelorette party. These so-called responsibilities by the bridesmaids, for example, were even listed on dozens of posts on Pinterest and various wedding blogs. But is this even applicable to Filipino culture? Are we really supposed to follow this? Does our culture implement this also in our own weddings? Well based on our experience, there’s actually no correct answer since it will depend on a lot of factors.
In order to make your wedding or event successful, you definitely need to “cooperate” 101% with your hired Coordinator. It’s a teamwork between you, your fiance and your suppliers. Usually, once you book your Wedding Coordinator (assuming it’s an On-The-Day Coord), they’ll automatically give you set of wedding guidelines and worksheets to do as well as a complete timeline where they’ll expect you to submit the needed lists (include the dreaded final guest list). In our case, our OTD Coordinator Imbitado Events told us to submit all our turn-over lists at least 3 weeks before our wedding. If there are any changes, it is important to update them ASAP so details can be fixed.
Now, if pasaway ka sa paggawa ng worksheets mo at late ka nag submit ng turn-over lists mo, then don’t expect to achieve your own “perfect” wedding. Huwag mo sisihin ang Wedding Coordinator mo kung madami palpak sa araw ng kasal mo. Team work talaga ang kelangan dito.
Anyway to give you an idea of our own turn-over list, below are the details of what we have given to our OTD wedding coordinator ahead of time. We also made sure to buy 2 big plastic boxes (around 50L from SM Dept Store for Php 599 pesos each) to contain all the necessary things that are included in our turn-over lists (filed in a filler organizer) each one labeled “for Preps/Ceremony “and “for Reception” so that our OTD coordinator won’t have any problems on our wedding day.
One of the underrated things that couples need to tick off from the Wedding Checklist is the Wedding Supplier Crew Meals. Before we thought that we don’t need to allot money for this since only a few suppliers will be present at our wedding and actually akala namin kasama na yung food nila sa bayad namin. Admittedly, we felt naive with this concept at first since here in Kuwait, whenever we freelance with some events, either we’d always be included in the guest list or we need to make sure that we’re already full and not expect our clients to feed us because it’s not part of the agreement. But, in the Philippines, it’s entirely different. So after we researched on the importance of crew meals and talking to our Coordinator, we came to realize that we should definitely provide for them because they will be working very hard for more than 6 hours on our wedding day! After going through all supplier contracts and double checking it with our Coordinator, we found out that our expected number of crews/staff have increased and that some wedding suppliers even have their own “preferred” meals or corresponding meal allowances.
When going to formal events such as weddings, invited guests would always receive notice of expected attires which would either be really formal or semi-formal. Unfortunately, not all guests would actually follow these “expected dress guidelines” for a number of reasons which would make them look either overdressed or underdressed. I’ve been to countless weddings myself and I’ve actually never been to one where everyone was dressed in the same color. Oddly, some would even try to outdo the couple by wearing white or something similar to what they were wearing to the point that you’d think they’re the couple who got married which I personally think was really inconsiderate.
During our wedding preparation, we really talked it over from the start that we wanted to have a type of wedding where everyone would look uniformly neat but still elegant of course. For others, this might look too controlling but for us, we just wanted to achieve this kind of elegant feels for our one-day big event! We debated on which color would be fitting for everyone and when we decided to have Black, we thought it’s a bit weird and definitely unusual for a wedding, more so a traditional Filipino wedding that we wanted for ourselves! Thankfully, we were able to check wedding event videos online (but mostly US based) with guests wearing “black attires” where the look was coined “black-tie event”. Since we’ve never been to a “black-tie wedding event” before, this would be something new and unique for us. A first for us… probably for our families and most of our guests as well.
Anyway, below is the Wedding Dress Code that we did for our invited guests to achieve our uniform black-tie event. We thought of creating this visual guide for them so they will find it easy to check what we expect them to wear to our wedding. We posted this dress code on our private FB page around 3 months before our wedding and sent it again to everyone via FB chat as a reminder 1 month before our big day.
“Brides lang ba dapat ang kikilos to prepare for the wedding?”
I have been asked about this a few times and kahit OC bride ako, the answer is NO. Here’s my take based from personal experience.
If you have the means, no problem with budget, hire the best possible Full Coordinator and let them do everything for you. You can just say yes and no at ganun din si fiancé mo. Kumbaga let your money work for you.
But, if you’re a budgeted bride like me, overseas based ka man or not, you need your fiancé to help you with everything.
We are Garry and Aiki, a newly-married Filipino couple based in Kuwait. We created this blog to document our own wedding planning journey after we got engaged last August 2015.
For 15 months, we carefully planned Our Budget Dream Wedding while we are both based overseas as OFWs where we heavily relied on the resources that we found online through various wedding magazines, blogs, Facebook groups, forums and Pinterest for our source of wedding inspiration. Since we weren’t able to go home to meet up with our shortlisted wedding suppliers, we used Email, Facebook chat, Viber, Skype and Instagram to communicate with them. It was quite challenging on our part because we only relied on our supplier client reviews/feedback and their output that was posted online.
How did we survive our wedding planning since we are based overseas? Simple.
Everything was done online – from research, communication, reservations/booking and even payments.
Is that a bit scary since you’re like gambling kasi hindi mo naman personally nakita yung mga supplier mo? Well, truth is… Suntok sa buwan talaga ang ginawa namin dahil buong loob kami na nag-tiwala sa Suppliers na kinuha namin na hindi nila kami lolokohin lalu na at nagkalat ang mga scammers! It’s all about “trust” talaga and doing your own “research” thoroughly. To be sure, get a reputable supplier na kilala na pero siyempre afford pa rin ng budget! And in our case, thankfully, everything went well. (Though except for a few minor flaws, of course.. and that’s another story to tell which you can read through our Wedding Supplier Reviews.)
Also throughout this wedding planning journey, we also came to realize na kulang yung information for couples who are planning to get married in the Philippines especially for OFWs like us and who are on a tight wedding budget! And initially, this blog is only intended for us to document everything, but because of this realization and the need to help other couples like us who are really confused with what they’re supposed to do, we decided to make all the information in our wedding blog publicly available and hopefully it would help others in their own wedding preps journey.
Overall, the journey was a rollercoaster ride of emotions filled with excitement, frustration, and bliss.. but it was a journey definitely worth remembering! This is #OurLoveStoReal and this is #OurBudgetDreamWedding .