There would probably be a time in your life that you have participated in a Wedding as part of the entourage but haven’t really understood the whole context of your “role”. Since Filipino Church Wedding traditions have its own beliefs, it is best to at least get to know them and then decide later on if you see yourselves okay to follow it. As a couple, you have every right to decide which is best for you during your wedding planning, but understanding our Filipino wedding culture is also the best way to give respect to the elders and to our roots.
Below is the list of the people who will be part of your Filipino Church Wedding Entourage, including the couple. Their description varies but their roles were standard as per Filipino Catholic tradition. For a more detailed information, it is highly advisable to seek your Church for any dress code and age restrictions.
The Confirmation or KumpilCeremony is one of the seven sacraments of the Catholic Church that is required by an individual if they wish to be married in the Catholic rites in the Philippines. Normally, this ceremony can be obtained when the parishioner reaches the age of 10 onwards but only if the person has already been Baptized in the Roman Catholic Church as a pre-requisite.
But the question is, what if you seemed to “forget” if you had undergone this Catholic ritual before? Or what if, if you really haven’t done it before? What can you do? Is it possible for an adult individual to get it rather quickly?
In order to make your wedding or event successful, you definitely need to “cooperate” 101% with your hired Coordinator. It’s a teamwork between you, your fiance and your suppliers. Usually, once you book your Wedding Coordinator (assuming it’s an On-The-Day Coord), they’ll automatically give you set of wedding guidelines and worksheets to do as well as a complete timeline where they’ll expect you to submit the needed lists (include the dreaded final guest list). In our case, our OTD Coordinator Imbitado Events told us to submit all our turn-over lists at least 3 weeks before our wedding. If there are any changes, it is important to update them ASAP so details can be fixed.
Now, if pasaway ka sa paggawa ng worksheets mo at late ka nag submit ng turn-over lists mo, then don’t expect to achieve your own “perfect” wedding. Huwag mo sisihin ang Wedding Coordinator mo kung madami palpak sa araw ng kasal mo. Team work talaga ang kelangan dito.
Anyway to give you an idea of our own turn-over list, below are the details of what we have given to our OTD wedding coordinator ahead of time. We also made sure to buy 2 big plastic boxes (around 50L from SM Dept Store for Php 599 pesos each) to contain all the necessary things that are included in our turn-over lists (filed in a filler organizer) each one labeled “for Preps/Ceremony “and “for Reception” so that our OTD coordinator won’t have any problems on our wedding day.
If you have read our previous post about the reasons Why you need a Wedding Coordinator, you can at least know now the importance of hiring one. Before we thought that hiring one would just be a waste of money or “pa-sosyal lang” but in reality, their job is one of the most crucial things to make the wedding successful because they are making sure that everything will be organized on the day itself. They would also be the one who will try to troubleshoot the unwanted and unforeseen problems that you might encounter on your wedding day. Bottomline, they will be your wedding best friends that will try their very best to make sure that you and your fiance will have the best possible “perfect once-in-a-lifetime wedding!” Though for newly engaged couples, it would be quite hard to determine which type you would need. But based on our experience and some of our friend’s experiences, we’ll just sum up which coordinators should you choose based on some of these basic pieces of information. These will vary depending on the couple in general.
Below are useful things you and your fiance can ponder to see which would suit your needs.
One of the underrated things that couples need to tick off from the Wedding Checklist is the WeddingSupplier Crew Meals. Before we thought that we don’t need to allot money for this since only a few suppliers will be present at our wedding and actually akala namin kasama na yung food nila sa bayad namin. Admittedly,we felt naive with this concept at first since here in Kuwait, whenever we freelance with some events, either we’d always be included in the guest list or we need to make sure that we’re already full and not expect our clients to feed us because it’s not part of the agreement. But, in the Philippines, it’s entirely different. So after we researched on the importance of crew meals and talking to our Coordinator, we came to realize that we should definitely provide for them because they will be working very hard for more than 6 hours on our wedding day! After going through all supplier contracts and double checking it with our Coordinator, we found out that our expected number of crews/staff have increased and that some wedding suppliers even have their own “preferred” meals or corresponding meal allowances.
When going to formal events such as weddings, invited guests would always receive notice of expected attires which would either be really formal or semi-formal. Unfortunately, not all guests would actually follow these “expected dress guidelines” for a number of reasons which would make them look either overdressed or underdressed. I’ve been to countless weddings myself and I’ve actually never been to one where everyone was dressed in the same color. Oddly, some would even try to outdo the couple by wearing white or something similar to what they were wearing to the point that you’d think they’re the couple who got married which I personally think was really inconsiderate.
During our wedding preparation, we really talked it over from the start that we wanted to have a type of wedding where everyone would look uniformly neat but still elegant of course. For others, this might look too controlling but for us, we just wanted to achieve this kind of elegant feels for our one-day big event! We debated on which color would be fitting for everyone and when we decided to have Black, we thought it’s a bit weird and definitely unusual for a wedding, more so a traditional Filipino wedding that we wanted for ourselves! Thankfully, we were able to check wedding event videos online (but mostly US based) with guests wearing “black attires” where the look was coined “black-tie event”. Since we’ve never been to a “black-tie wedding event” before, this would be something new and unique for us. A first for us… probably for our families and most of our guests as well.
Anyway, below is the Wedding Dress Code that we did for our invited guests to achieve our uniform black-tie event. We thought of creating this visual guide for them so they will find it easy to check what we expect them to wear to our wedding. We posted this dress code on our private FB page around 3 months before our wedding and sent it again to everyone via FB chat as a reminder 1 month before our big day.
From the end of 2015 when we got engaged until our wedding month in December 2016, the weeks just went by so fast! 2016 was a year full of hope while we were both busily preparing for our dream wedding, trying to make everything perfectly organized and carefully deciding on different things. And then just right before Christmas, December 23 came and in a couple of hours, our wedding was done! 15 long months of preparation and in just a blink of an eye, our most awaited day finally came to an end. Just like what they say, it wasn’t really the end but the beginning of our new journey, now as Mr. and Mrs. Nochefranca!
During our wedding preps, everything was on a tight budget. From our major suppliers until down to the very smallest detail, everything was accounted for. And like any other couple, we, of course wanted everyone to be reminded of our special day but not to the extent of printing save the date cards and sending them out to our guests. They’re good, no offense, but for us it’s pretty much redundant already since we already planned to give out our official formal wedding invites. Plus, the printing and shipping would cost us a few thousand that we felt would be better off with our invites or some other important wedding supplier. Besides, we don’t want to jump on the bandwagon. We wanted to be unique. We wanted to showcase who we are as a couple. So..what better way to present it was through our passion — photography and videography!
“Brides lang ba dapat ang kikilos to prepare for the wedding?”
I have been asked about this a few times and kahit OC bride ako, the answer is NO. Here’s my take based from personal experience.
If you have the means, no problem with budget, hire the best possible Full Coordinator and let them do everything for you. You can just say yes and no at ganun din si fiancé mo. Kumbaga let your money work for you.
But, if you’re a budgeted bride like me, overseas based ka man or not, you need your fiancé to help you with everything.